I really can't help it...

I dedicate this lovely feeling and the hot chocolate in my Santa mug to the stranger who drew " (peace sign) + ♥ "in front of Macy's tonight. Chivalry is not dead. Magic is still alive. Turn an ordinary day into an extraordinary one with a little positivity. It can always be the most wonderful time of the year.

Who's that crazy girl? Oh wait thats ME!

My youtube debut!



Happy holidays!

Being in love with yourself and faith!

So I have been gong a little nuts lately. Yes I mean it. I have been having really high and really low thoughts lately. Like really low. grrr

A few things i have learned this weekend that I would like to share:

- Instead of being jealous because someone has something I want or is doing something that I want to do, I need to realize that it is not a threat but it should be an inspiration. Especially if I have known them. Its like if you can do it, then I can!!

- Vanity is ok. If it makes you happy and more comfortable with yourself then do it. Be in love with yourself!!!

- I am worth the money and a whole lot more.

- Faith. I finally know what the word means. After being in catholic schools since I was 4 years old until I graduated from college. I always passed over the word and didn't give it much thought. Now I realize that yes faith does exist and it is an essential part of creation. With out it you might just fucking die. Seriously. You know the whole "I think therefore I am" bit? It can be translated to "I have faith therefore I am"

Even though you have not seen tomorrow, you know its there. Even thought you do not see your house on the way home, you know its there. That is how people should view their biggest dreams. Its there just like everything you have already.

If you don't have something nice to say

don't say anything. I seriously just wanna hide my face right now.

For give me I'm having a moment. A long one.



(photo from lovehatethings.com)

Hmmmm

A little yelly and did i just see him rub a man's face in his crotch on the AMA's? God bless America!

Beauty

is defined by the mind and heart.

Reflections on This Time of the Month

I should be muzzled when i have my period. Do not take anything I say or d to offense. I am literally a rebel without a cause. Thank you for your time.

Epiphany on a Rainy Day

I want to speak to someone. Someone famous. Someone that has done something great.

I am not opposed to talking to someone who is my age doing what im doing or maybe more behind than me because I can learn something of value from any other human being. I want to talk to someone who is where they wanted to be all along. Who is living the dream. I want to ask them. Did you ever feel the way I am feeling right now? Stretched--ready to explode from whats going on inside--implode from whats going on outside--excited-- jealous--scared--in l0ve with so much and afraid to lose it before you even tried to get it?!

I know what i want to do. But how the hell am I going to pull all of this off? I feel like there is someone in the world resisting me, saying no before i even try. But i know that person is a version of me that i can erase. Its something that i can decide against. Maybe its like acting, all this training, thinking and in the end its all about forgetting it all and freeing yourself. The teachings become your body. You are not aware they are there but they are at all times moving you through your life and making you recognizable to people. It is your cells. It is your brain. It is everything correct or seemingly incorrect you can do.

I really wish i knew someone who was living the epitome of their dream right now. I really want to talk to someone.

I can't wait, I CAN'T WAIT, I CAN'T WAIT!!

I want to do so much and it scares me that i will just be ordinary. I will not settle. I never have. And i do not care if i am overwelhming to anyone. I have so much going on inside i cannot fathom being any other way right now.

No Doubt : Now Playing : No Doubt Acoustic! - Bridge School Benefit Video

No Doubt : Now Playing : No Doubt Acoustic! - Bridge School Benefit Video

Yay! From the Return of Saturn album, Love it!

Now this Would Be One for the Books

Two people feel the same thing at the same time for each other and they are not afraid to go for it.

We are the Light of the World

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is OUR LIGHT, not our darkness, that frightens us most. *We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your PLAYING SMALL DOES NOT SERVE THE WORLD. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And *WHEN WE LET OUR OWN LIGHT SHINE, WE UNCONSCIOUSLY GIVE OTHERS PERMISSION TO DO THE SAME. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

-Maryanne Williamson

This week has been a whirlwind of emotions/ confessions/ truth/ and beauty regardless of it being awkward. Its been tiring to say the least and tonight after my work holiday party i was feeling it. Sleepy, a bit dizzy-- just my energy was way off. I know when i am like that i tend to put things out there, vibes, etc that do not necessarily reflect how I actually feel. Well anyway, i couldn't figure out what was bothering me and what to do about it so i just took it easy. Took a nice slow walk to my bus not making any big decisions along the way.

So this quote at the top of this post is something my friend posted on facebook nearly a month ago. We commented on it here and there and of course i get the respective notifications. She decided to comment on it around 1130, the time i caught my bus. Since it was brought to my attention I reread the quote i feel better already. It just all snaps into place when i read this.

We choose where we are in life. We choose the fear or the love. The dark or the light. If we want to grow and become the phenomenal things we are meant to become we need the light, because, baby nothing can grow in the dark.

up for 36 hours/ proclamations of <3

By the time i went to sleep yesterday at 10pm i had been up for 36 hours.

Why? Because i could not stop THINKING!

About what? F-ing everything. My job, acting, my looks, my body, my romantic endeavors (yeah i actually have those), and romantic aspirations. Over analysing every little thing. Not completely cynical but borderline.

So i didn't sleep and then i decided to go to work for my full shift. 6am-3pm I felt on edge the whole day. Thank God the peeps I work with are wonderful. Really they are.

Then i power napped at home for a mere 20 min. Woke up and went out with my dad to a museum opening party. It was super nice and classy. Open bar. Pretty art.

Then I went home and talked on aim for a bit. This is at the 35th hour mark of my never ending day. Lack of sleep = lack of judgement -- or maybe enhanced listening to the unheard things in life, like intuition. Long story short I once again revealed some deep rooted feelings for someone to said person. It was brief, I tried not to be overwhelming because lord knows i can be over even the smallest things. Anyway I poured a little bit of my heart out once again and received and thank you and a pat on the back..once again.

Its like I wish I could choose who i love but i really can't. I tend to be passionate about things and people that are unattainable and it just really hurts sometimes. I feel like i am constantly trying to be a knight and shining armour. Save someone, win something, make them love me, climb up to a high ranking in life. Some people are ok with just security, just the basics. I want something great. But usually something tells me to stop when its not good for me. A voice, a sign, a dream, something. I have had bunches of signs and dreams literally telling me to keep going. The crazy thing is, it hurts sometimes, but it doesn't stop me. It just makes me stronger. Its like that quote from All's Well That Ends Well:

" I know I love in vain, strive against hope;
Yet in this cap'cious and intenible sieve
I still pour in the waters of my love and lack not to loose still"

ahh Shakespeare, you know your stuff.

Ok enough. For now.

Sunday Morning Coffee

I find it charming when people drink caffeinated beverages on a Sunday. It tells me, "I wanna be awake for my life, not just my work."

I don't remember the last time i blogged but i can safely say that since that point life has progressed in a positive way. I'm working less at the day job, spending more time with family and friends, performed in another show with my company--I feel like i am definitely going in the right direction.

I had a dream last weekend. A prophetic dream. In the dream a stranger told me to stick with the performing arts and encouraged me that this was the right road to be on. I know dreams have symbolic freaky meanings and most things aren't literal but it is rare that someone stops my looks me in the eye and tells me what i have to do. It has only happened to me once before in a dream and I truly believe that what was said will come true.

Well, like i was saying, Its charming to see someone with a warm breakfast beverage such as tea or coffee meant to wake them up on the weekend. Not one of those Red bulls and what not. Takes the tradition out of the whole scene. To me drinking a Monster or something signals "Party time!" I sit here calmly on this Sunday afternoon with my Tazo Awake tea making the choice to be present for every moment of my day.

What i want to do

SO, to ease myself into my restful state ( that is ever so important to night, because i have to wake up at 4 am manana) I had 2 glasses of wine. I am now feeling quite relaxed and chipper..chipper in a relaxed way. The word chipper is too energetic for the way i am feeling. If you think of something a little more languid let me know.

Talk about taking the edge off. this really did. I was feeling very edgy. It needed to stop.

Do you ever stop and think that your mind/body is the creator of all the solutions to all of your problems? I am doing some investigation on that and will let you know of the results as soon as i can decipher them.

And so, I haven't been writing much. But things have been happening. A lot of acting with my theatre company. Less working, thank gawd. More family time. I read somewhere in the world there is a culture who believes family is a source of strength. I agree.

One thing that has been happening lately (and i have no clue what to do about it) are random urges to do things at random times. Mostly visit people. Late. Or to run really fast through an open space.

Eveything is fine otherwise. Up to par. Tip top. Hip hop and you know i dont stop!

Close Encounter

So now i will tell you the story that i have been telling people all day. My close encounter with the wild.

I was on my way to work. It was around 545 am. There was no one on my street but me. Or so I thought...

Its not like I heard a noise or anything to make me look in the general direction of the gate that surrounds the ivy patch on the side of my building. Maybe I felt its presence. I looked instinctively to my right and up to the top of the gate and there it was...an opossum.

It was big and looked a like an over sized rat with a demonic monkey face. I wasn't sure what it was at first but somehow i had the vague idea that it was indeed a possum. Even though i have never seen one up close before..

It was looking into my eyes. It was smiling, but the way its face was shaped, it looked sinister. I thought he was going to attack me. So i kept my cool and walked away and then i took the bus 1 stop to the train instead of walking. I couldn't risk it following me to my stop!

On the train i looked up possums on my iphone. apparently it is an "opossum" bc possums are from Australia. And they are common in the Northeast of the US so its not to crazy to have seen one considering i live near a river (it may be the NYC but yeah) they don't attack. they are also a good omen:

Opossum may be relaying to you that you are to expect the unexpected and be clever in achieving your victory. Opossum is beckoning you to use your brain, your sense of drama, and surprise - to leap over some barrier to your progress. Just be aware of your surroundings and stay on your toes

Taken from http://www.globalpsychics.com/amusing-you/superstition/rabbit.shtml

After rereading this.,.well its obvious..i need to get some stat. How is this my story of the day? oh jeez

Dream Meanings

Weird dream last night. Some of the symbols. (taken from swoon.com)

Chase

No luxury, but a comfortable old age through your own efforts is forecast in a dream in which you participated in or observed a chase.

Shopping Mall

These uniquely American complexes are like cathedrals, promising a consumer dream, a social setting and ample parking--all under the watchful eye of a security camera. The overall meaning here is that invisible forces are dictating your life. Take heed of what kinds of stores fill the various levels for more precise insight. If you are trapped in a labyrinthine or closed shopping mall, you may be frustrated by the lack of spontaneity and choice in your waking life. If you dream of a strip mall, you can take or leave the restrictive circumstances at any time.

Escalator

This dream symbol follows the general rule that up is an omen of success and down is not; however, in this particular instance, a downward motion indicates a defeat that could be reversible by the application of intelligent determination.

Fortune Cookies are on top of their game!

And that is why I am eating avocado and Lays classic chips past my bedtime. I obeyed my fortune cookie and am living the moment the way i want to..consuming.

Fortune cookies totally saying the right thing this month. Like recently I opened one that said "The big issues are work, career or status right now." And YES those are all issues for me right now..big ones!

Dude, are you wearing Chanel No. 5?

Yuppers. There was a dude wearing Chanel No. 5 on my early train this morning. I looked around to see if it was coming from a woman, you know considering its a woman's fragrance and no--no no it was coming from a man.

I can see scents and let me tell you my entire vision was clouded with sour yellow and gray fuzzy splotches. Not cool, man. not cool.

Free time/Me time at home

I went on a walk today and I came across these two CD's on the cracked side walk. I thought i was the only one in the neighborhood to listen to Hoobastank. Who is this mysterious eclectic music lover? I must know..I must know...

The church of the elementary school i went to when i was in the 2nd grade. Only for that yr. Funny enough I reconnected with some people from my second grade class in my high school. Yes, i am sure this is all terribly interesting to you all. (lol) If you look hard you can see the sign above the doors it says "Faith", "Hope", "Love". I went to this church every Sunday for about 2 years after i got together with my first love to thank God that it all worked out.
Reason why I am feeling loose and having a loud conversation with Mom and her boyf right now.
So many bottles. Only one is drinkable.

Things I wanted to say today but didn't

Things i wanted to say today but didn't because i thought they might have been offensive or it was just not the right time to say them.

(no particular order)

• Please God do not let me turn out like these people...ever.
• They maybe fucked up but I'm sure i can use this experience of being around these weirdos to create an amazing character one day for a film or play.
• Disappear. Please Disappear.
• OMG shut up.
• Break me off a piece of that!
• Have you EVER cleaned your bathroom ever?
• I'm sorry.
• I'm a stalker. OMG i use facebook to stalk.
• Break me off a piece of that too!
• I miss you.
• Let's be together everyday for the rest of our lives.

Thanks for listening :)

Explosive Love

(from: http://www.istoica.com/everyday/images/20051122205400_explosive_web.jpg)

I typed "explosive love" in a google search and this is what i got.

Youtube Hilariousness

Great commercial. This next one for some odd reason came up in related vids:



than i just got inthe Sesame St mood:



I got self conscious about my vid choice and typed in sexy in a search..this is what i got



Oh the joys of internet

AIM Quote of the night!

Richie (12:23:27 AM): But you and your brother should take over the world
Me (12:23:29 AM): ooo
Me (12:23:31 AM): lol
Richie (12:23:33 AM): and there should be blimps
Richie(12:23:36 AM): flying around the world
Richie (12:23:38 AM): replaying my laughter
Me (12:24:40 AM): OMG thats going on the blog
Richie (12:25:42 AM): LoL

LoL: Aim snippet of the day

Me (10:36:55 PM): its scary, like a weapon
Richie (10:36:59 PM): oh my
Richie(10:37:02 PM): I cant wait

Vacations, No Doubt, and all things holy!

Things are changing. Oh yes yes they are.

This first year back home has come full circle and we are back at the beginning of the summer once again. This yeah has taught me a lot and made me realize how important having a home really is.

I use to run away from home. Well not literally but in the mind--yes home was not..cool for me, for lack of a better word. Once i hit the teeny bopper years i would find ways and reasons to be out. Nothing bad at all, just out. Hanging out. or if i was home i was on the phone with the door closed on the phone, dedicating my time to people who were not family. Who didn't need to love me. Having their love and approval was greater to me because they didn't have to love me. So i worked for that.

I spent a lot of time at home this year. I fought it at first but then i settled into it and realized that i am lucky to have a home in many senses of the word. I have a home in my family and my physical apt. I also have a home in my friends and most importantly in my mind. something i can take with me where ever i go. I can enrich it with new knowledge or if the world gets to overwhelming I can go back to the things that make me feel at home...






From DR trip





from No Doubt concert

Back and Tanned :)

I had tons of fun, heart to heart talks, beach, ocean and vacating this on my vacation for the past 5 days in sunny DR and yes I brought the sun back with me so, your welcome for the good weather.

You can tell how relaxed I have been, beginning my post with a run on sentence. (naughty- NAUGHTY!!)

Anywho--pictures to come of course. Not of me. I dont like to show my face on the blogosphere. Its already enough that I am on facebook.

I am too sleepy to detail the trip the way I want to at the moment but i do want to talk about one thing in particular:

You cannot escape your problems by flying away.

Its a mind thing. No matter where you are you have to get your mind out of the fuck that its in. Or else you are going to carry it around with you like a big suitcase with a broken wheel (im a bit sad that my luggage broke today :/ ).

I left relaxed and I managed to stress myself out in the first 2 hours of being back in NY. And FOR WHAT? Making plans. Feeling desperate. You know I always hate to describe this as a problem but how can a person make you feel this great and this fucked at the same time. How.

Anyway, I need to go to bed. But before that. I will engross myself in Harry Potter and The Half-blood Prince in order to prepare myself for the release of the movie on the 13th.

By the way, I have narrated this entire thing in a British accent in my head because I just watched Bridget Jones' Diary with my mum..yes mum.

Vacation!

So my vacation started at exactly 5pm today but i had some things to take care of after work and now i am too tired to have the proper amount of excitement. I am assuming when it finally hits me, i react in a similar way Kevin McCalister reacts at exactly 4 min and 20 secs into the following clip:

Picture of the Day!

This is a little piece of the morning. I was waiting for my train at 5am (yum). One of the perks of having the early shift at work is I get to watch the sun rise on the way. Also I get to leave early, but I was so tired that i couldn't properly do anything once i got home. It was strange. My body was done for the day but my mind was still running wild with thoughts AND i was very aware of my heartbeat. it was like my body was so quiet that my heart was more audible.

I thought this sunrise was beautiful and wanted to share it. It looks like the way I have been feeling these days: romantic, hopeful, and vibrant..and damn proud of it!

Lucky

God has a weird way of letting me know how good I really have it.

Today something startling happened and work and I ended up leaving early. Someone shoplifted (as usual) which always gets me shook up even though I don't show it. This time they decided to knock me out of the way and physical contact with someone I already get bad vibes from-- just yeah..i couldn't deal with it (ha, ha I got all hippie on you) . My boss (honestly, I work with the most understanding people in the whole world) let me finish the day right then and there. I just had to wait for some cops to file a report with.

I was not alone in waiting. A great friend of mine had stopped by on his day off a few minutes before everything happened and he ended up staying with me the entire time, dealing with my weird emotions, totally there for me as always (thank you, love!). I know there are no coincidences. It was awesome that he just happened to be there on a day that he wasn't suppose to be.

I'm home now and on the way here i began to wonder, Why was it so hard for me to finish the day after the incident? Its not like I was badly hurt. Its not that it was the most horrible thing that has ever happened. I have seen worse, been struck harder, been alone to deal and still found a way to organize my feelings so I can still get done everything I had to get done. During high school for example, during one day the following things were felt/ happened on a daily basis:

• My parents were in the middle of a messy adulterous divorce and I had to deal with hearing mom gush about her secret beau or listen/ see my dad kick in a door because of his sadness/anger-pain.
• Somehow comfort my little bro who couldn't deal with hearing the loud arguing
• School drama, someone stole my bf, someone thinks i stole there bf, half the school thinks I'm a lesbian, etc
• Drama drama: play rehearsals/ hip hop crew rehearsals
• Oh AND i was secretly in love with someone for about 2 years. Got together in the end though.

College was crazier because the work load got worse. But somehow, I always found a way to deal. And if this happened to me then, I think i would be at work right now finishing my shift. But here I am home and I feel like I am cowering. But who do I have to prove anything to?

I need to over flow with love, I have to. I want to feel bigger and stronger and more open with every decision I make and every feeling I feel. Last night, walking to my building I felt tough and in control but that was only for a minute. Lately I have been feeling small, alone, closed off.

Did anyone else feel like this in there early mid twenties? I feel like I am going through quarter-life menopause or something. I mean my cycle has changed a bit and DAMN all these emotions!

Ok--I hope the monthly cycle thing wasn't TMI but seriously wtf?

Analyzing Dreams

So I have been doing a lot of thinking. I even wrote (started to write, rather) an essay on love.
opening line: I cannot ignore these feelings any longer by doing mundane things. It's more exhausting to ignore them than to feel them.

All of that thinking and processing of course led me to having a very exciting dream. Here are some of the symbols from my dream analyzed:

Fish
Fish are lucky in dreams, representing spiritual growth and transformation.To see fish swimming in your dream, signifies insights from your unconscious mind. (ok I already knew my mind was trying to tell me something, but what?)

Dock
If others are on the dock with you, you need to strengthen your friendships.

Beach
The beach in your dream symbolizes the meeting between your two states of mind. The sand represents your rational brain, while the water symbolizes your irrational and emotional aspects. To dream that you are on the beach and looking out toward the ocean indicates unknown and major changes that are occurring in your life. (Yeeees Jackpot!)

Ocean
Dreams about the ocean are strong signals from the unconscious mind. A peaceful sea suggests the dreamer is comfortable with herself and her sexuality. (hmmm..)

Train
Dreams of riding a train symbolize your journey along life's path, especially in the realm of romance. (I hope its to somewhere good)

Room
If the room was very tiny, it symbolizes a lucky last-minute escape from a bad mistake.

White (walls)
A good dream omen.

Paris
This beautiful city is a symbol of gaiety and predicts a season of carefree social activity--but be careful not to get drawn into doing things you cannot easily afford.

Cell Phone
In the world of dreams, a cell phone represents a barrier to communication, not a convenience

Interesting...

No White Flags Here

So I listened to "White Flag" by Dido the other day and realized that it describes what is going on with me perfectly. And that is why it is on my new playlist for your listening enjoyment.

Hazy, misty, coming from within sensations do not lie! The body doesn't lie. So why the f does this hurt so much sometimes.. Like i said in earlier "I need a vacation from you. Wanna come?" Fucking drastic measures need to be taken.

Thank God that i am actually going on vacation ( and with someone else. someone platonic) bc if I was in New York on my week off I would probably so the same things that I do all the time.

It takes too much brain power and with all the thought I put into this-- I shouldn't even be writing this right now. I shouldn't be blasting this to society. I wish i could truly and honestly explain myself to ANYONE. Someone who won't judge but will have some sort of insight to what the fuck-- But I can't. To most people its childish.

Newest Vintage Comeback = 3 D Shades

So far I have seen 2 gay men and a handful of hipsters (sexuality unknown) rocking these babies. I tried a pair that one of said gays was wearing tonight.

To be even cooler i tried them on indoors at night.


Yeah, I'm in with the in crowd.

Chase Bank Parking Lot = New Lovers Lane?

Walking home from train to my building about 20min ago slightly inebriated, i decided to focus on the simple things that i overlook on a daily basis. Like the street signs that glisten in the glow from the rain and traffic lights, or the Dunkin Donuts late night pick up window dude, or the oasis that is the Chase bank parking lot.

I pass it every day but never really take a good look. It is quite gorgeous in the glare of the streetlights. Little bushes in different shades of green surround it. Smooth pavement. A space behind the bank (part of the drive thru of the bank.) It intrigued me. I wanted to know more. Better yet, i wanted to make out.

It was a strange feeling to feel. Passing by something so long and out of nowhere you feel its potential sexuality. I wasn't attracted to the bank or the bank parking lot itself, but rather the idea of fooling around in that space.

I settled for a quickie iPhone picture. But one day, one special day (preferably night) I will have my way with someone in that parking lot...and that parking lot will in turn have its way with me.

On a more romantic note...

Have you ever felt that something was so incredibly possible that you can feel it touching your skin as you are thinking about it? You can feel the anticipation, the weather, the energy, your breathing pattern--everything about the moment that is being created in your mind? Your future felt through your thoughts.
I am not speaking about wanting one type of thing. This is about a calling. Being called to a certain person, place, vocation. No matter how far fetched (i need to STOP using that word!) no matter how long the wait is--the mind can create worlds. That is why i named this blog created to create and the address is "dreams create worlds" because it is the f-ing truth. Dreams do create worlds. Signs do exist. And the mind can take you anywhere. If you go there in the mind, you can go there physically. The only thing that is holding you back is your belief system. Do you believe what you are creating? And when you feel butterflies in your tummy when you are simply thinking (that was an oxymoron, thinking is ever so complex as it is simple) simply thinking about holding hands with that special someone, about standing on the top of a mountain, having a family, etc.--especially if you didn't even plan on thinking it and it just enters your mind--when you can just feel it brush your skin because its so close and real..then you are absolutely right: Its there for the receiving. Just believe.

Snuffleupagus

Thats right, I said it: Snuffleupagus. Deal with it.

So my brother brought to my attention that at some point in Sesame Street Snuffleupagus was invisible to all except Big Bird. I was like, "Pssh, no WAY!" but its true.. all true!

For 14 long years Snuffleupagus was Big Birds imaginary friend unseen by any adults on the show. Poor Snuffleupagus.

And that explains why i don't remember. I was born a year after he came out of the closet..or where ever invisible characters live before they are seen by all.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Snuffleupagus for more info

Places to go, people to see..but where?

I am due for some much needed vacation time but where does one go when she traveling alone?
I have been searching and searching for things to do, and i have money enough to go somewhere..but where? I know if i stay in NYC i will end up doing some sort of work. Please God give me a sign!

The Early Show Part 2: Kris Allen!!

So I went back to the Early Show early yesterday morning, soo early that ended up taking int train with a friend who had to be at work for a 6am shift. This time i toughed it out sola (alone)--well not completely because i was surround by tons of Kris Allen's fans!! Way more people showed up for him than Adam which i thought was pretty awesome :)


I was literally the first person there. I showed up before 6 ( insane), had a lovely conversation with one of the CBS guys who is also from the Bronx and chilled in the Apple store for 10 min. When i came back up there were about 15 more people. They seemed to come together. Then they came in crews, teams, caravans--the line to line up was around the block and me at the front of it, ha ha ha!


I eneded up talking to a few people. One kid who was from Queens who cut class to come see Kris, another girl from the website krisallenation.com (which is a pretty intense fansite--loves it!), and this woman from Louisiana who was part of the first caravan to show up after me. They rearrranged us a few times for cinematography purposes, etc. They made him perform facing the cameras and not us (booooo!)! I saw the performance on CBS today and it looked awesome and epic. My view not the best but i managed to get good shots and ::drum roll:: his autograph!!


I wanna thank the lady from Louisiana for passing my sketch book to him to sign, Thank you!


He is just as hot in person as he is on TV! Here are some pics to prove it:

Sonia Sotomayor and I walked the same Spellman halls :)

Sonia Sotomayor nominee for the Supreme Court is not only from my home town, but went to my high school, Cardinal Spellman!

Don't know much about her? Educate yourself : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sonia_Sotomayor

The Early Show pt 1: Adam Lambert

So I have lived in NYC my whole life and have never gone downtown on the bright to see someone famous at any of the various news shows that have an audience screaming and yelling outside..holding signs. I always thought it was kinda dorky, and the prospect of waking up before the sun never appealed to me. But why should all the out of towners get to see people sing for free? "Hi! I'm Tracey from Minnesota!! Hi Mom!" Yeah im from Uptown (Bronx), Wuddup??!!

Ok so my bro and I decided to wake up early and see Adam Lambert on the CBS Early Show and ooo was it early and cold, but worth it. He sounded great, looked great, talked to me and gave me and autograph and high fived my lil' bro. f-ing sweet.

I was sandwiched between and large group of kids from Mississippi (soo adorable!) and this obsessive woman from Bethlehem, PA. She was a trip. We were all behind these gates, and at one point some people from the CBS crew stood in front of us. She started flipping out.

Crazy lady: (obnoxiously) Hey! that's not fair! why do you get to be up front?!
Random woman: (extremely nice) Oh, sorry they just put us here *smiles*
Crazy lady: (edge on her voice) Well you better crouch down! Ive been here since 6!
Random Woman: Ok ill do that when he comes out.
Crazy lady: (whining) Well do it nooow! So we can practice what we're doing!

F-ing nuts.

Best part is that she told one of the CBS people to give him a package she had for him. it was a framed poem wrapped in silver wrapping paper. I got it in my picture of her (yeeees)


How adorable is he?!



Intense.


This is just part 1..
b/c my future husband Kris Allen will be there on Thursday..
And i will be there once again!!

Ten good reasons

I just gave myself a challenge because I've just noticed that i am not smiling or feeling happy as i sit her and email my headshot out to casting people for auditions. the challenge: Name 10 reasons that I am not smiling.

1. Its f-ing sooo hot in my apt. I haven't put up the AC and breezes are scarce. I have a permanent dewy look as a result.
2. I don't wanna do work, like typing and thinking. I just wanna read my book!
3. I;m a little sleepy.
4. TBA?
5. ummmm...
6. ......

Ok so there are no good reasons for me to be unhappy about the fact that i have the time, resources and know how to submit myself for auditions. I am doing something to enhance my passion, my life.. and i shouldn't be all Captain Mopey-Pants about it!

Ten Reasons I should be happy and grateful for this moment and :) (smile):

1. I have a computer that works and I can do this from the comfort of my own room.
2. It doesnt take that long because I have been doing this for a while now.
3. I am pursuing my dreams :)
4. I am being proactive in my life.
5. this is my one task for the day. the rest of my day was spent hanging out with the family.
6. There are actually a lot of really cool roles to submit for this week.
7. I live in NYC which makes all of this incredibly accessible to me.
8. I can stay up and do it because I have my morning free.
9. The dewy air is keeping my skin moist. It also makes me appreciate when the wind does decide to flow.
10. The more I put myself out there, the more people will think of me for roles.

Ok, now that wasn't so bad after all!

Turn On's: A lil' song and dance

So i wanna share one of my my major turn ons with you all.

I guess like attracts like because I have a thing for performers. It dates back to high school. I mean i can notice someone and accept their attractiveness but not be too excited about them. Like this one kid, we'll call him Darren, in the school show with me my soph yr. We had been rehearsing forever at this point and one day I really paid attention to him during his solo or rather, he stole my attention. I could not stop thinking about him, staring at him, strategically placing myself in his view in the cafeteria, following him around in the halls. It was crazy. It was like my vision was locked.

I eventually got over him and in to someone else over time. Nothing ever happened, i was a lil shy and he was part of this religion in which he couldn't date so even though he was amazingly hot he was not getting any. weird. Sucks for him. But anyway, its happened a number of times over the past few years. I think someone is attractive, they sing in front of me and now i want there body on top, inside and around my body. It hits me like a train and its harder to get rid of than--IDK something really really difficult to get rid of, like an oil stain, or an STD--wait i should not have said that, because this feeling is good GREAt, even.

Its intensified when the person is playing an instrument. Like a guitar, or piano, or fucking anything. Harmonica, mandolin (yeah, Katie!) or drums. I abso-fucking-lutly get so turned on by all of this. Each note--you know and it maybe because I see colors when i hear sounds--its being created and OOOH! I cannot deal with it!!!!

Doing performing arts in college, i realized it can happen with acting too. Not as intense as music but yeah-- put on aluminium foil as a costume and do a monologue and i might wanna do you.

Maybe its the fearlessness that comes with being on stage. I didn't realise it til now but that is a huge factor. You have to be fearless and in order to be fearless you HAVE to be exuding love. So is it love vibes that I am responding to?

There is also the creation factor. Any moment created on stage (and life for that matter) cannot be reproduced to be what it was originally. You cannot copy it or truly plan it. Its exciting,to be creating somehting on the spot from your mind.

Anyway I bring this up because of my recent obsession with Kris Allen our new American Idol. I am obsessed because he can sing and not play just one but two instruments and he has a very boyish look to him (another turn on that never fails me). Also hes taken, usually things that seem impossible to me make me want them more..lol well i shouldn't say impossible because nothing is. Oh, and i like his hair.

OMG! Thank GAWD I just got sleepy, i gotta wake up DUMB early tomorrow..

Kris Allen, please let me make sweet love to you!

Dear Kris,

You make me feel young again. Well I guess i shouldn't say that because we are the same age and 23 is pretty young. I will rephrase. You make me feel like i did when I was 13 and WORSHIPPED NSYNC! I wanna hang posters of you in my room, at my job, in my journal because you are just too f-ing cute and sexy. I don't even think you are trying hard, you know, to be sexy. It just comes naturally to you i guess. Have that hot boy-next-door thing going on that I go crazy over! I really hope that you win tomorrow because i think that you deserve it. I have massive respect/ attraction to those who can sing AND play an instrument and you play two hot ones. Either way, you will still be successful. I can so see you releasing an album, me and millions of others buying it. I can also picture you collaborating with a lot of people, like from all different types of genres and stuff. Great amazing things coming your way.

Well now that I am finished hitting on you I will be completely frank and say, you are very talented and you should win. Good luck, rest up and tell your wife the minute she turns around i will snatch you up so fast--j/k She's very lucky.

See you when you perform in NYC!!

Always,
Created2Create

P.S. Just kidding about kidding about snatching you away. I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Do what you love.

No matter how ridiculous or crazy people think you are!
That tingly warm happy feeling is not lying to you.
You are exactly where you need to be when you are happy :)

OMG!! HE MADE IT TO THE FINALS!!!

Kris Allen made it to the final show! He's in the top two! I am so going to have my way with him its not even a joke. Like Manhattan, not a joke (see two posts earlier)!!

Mom just hugged the TV bc Danny Gocky was eliminated. Her boyf is somewhere crapping his pants because Danny was his fave. Mom and i had a lovely hysterical screaming joyful moment when Kris' name was called. LOL.com I was suppose to be boycotting this?

Did i mention that i bought mom and us tix to see the Idol tour? me = sellout

American Idol Cutie

Most of you know who Kris Allen is--finalist on American Idol


in danger of elimination in just a few min..:(

He is sooo damn cute i cannot contain my excitment!! Another cutie from Arkansas. Uh-mazing!

So hot, so married..so MAD!!

Quote of the Day

"Manhattan is no joke. You either come hard or you stay home!"

Quote from Sharon during this morning's meeting.

Ha,ha! make it here, you can make it anywhere :)

The Waiting Game

AHHHH so i called the Copyright Office to check the status of my poems..and O to the M to the G, my friend--its going to be ready in August...AUGUST!! That is 6 Months since i sent it in February. Grrr. Why must it take soo long? I mean i think it is great that so many people want to get their creative works protected.. because that means there is a lot of creating going on but DAMN! I don't want to wait this looong!

It'll be fine. At least i know when it will be ready. Yes for the glass being half full!

Quote of the Day!

Richie and I while watching "A Land Before Time"

Richie(12:42:31 PM): i know when i would watch this part when i was little i wanted to eat leaves
Me(12:43:14 PM): i always wanted to eat things that cartoons ate.. it always looked so good
Richie(12:43:21 PM): i knooo
Me(12:43:27 PM): like even real food
Richie(12:43:40 PM): lol i used to want to eat and drink the tiny meals the pokemon people ate
Richie(12:43:46 PM): cause they looked so sweet and delicious
Richie (12:44:00 PM): and filling

Me (12:44:02 PM): OMG quote of the day
Me(12:44:16 PM): thats going on the blog
Richie(12:44:19 PM): LOL

Behold...LIFE!

Welcome baby Kayla!!

Today I had the blessing of holding new life in my arms.

I wonder what little babies dream about. Because you can dream of things that haven't happened yet..Is she dreaming about her whole life?

Congrats Janiece!

All You Need is Love

I am blessed to have people in my life that teach me things by just simply existing. Like how to be peaceful, relax, let things come to you. How to take advantage of everyday and try to spend every moment of it doing something that makes you feel amazing. Little messages keep popping up on people, like the random man i saw walking on 34th st the other day with the tattoo that said "Don't Settle". Nothing is a coincidence. Everything is a sign.

So yesterday as usual, i was on the two train with a coworker on the way home. We were talking about a lot of random stuff and somehow landed on the subject of cartoons. We were talking about Avatar The Last Airbender (which i am not completely fluent in yet, but have watched a few eps with a little help from and avid fan). If you dont know it, basically, the characters can bend the elements. So of course because we are on the 2 train, a random man cuts in the conversation talking about how that is his sons favorite show and how amazed he is how cartoons have evolved expressively since the days of Elmer Fud. From dynamite to air-bending. He somehow linked that to Moses parting the sea and the next thing i know, we are being preached to.

He said many things. He wasn't pushy like most 2 train evangelists are. I really wanted to listen and did. You can learn a lot from listening. He said one thing that really stuck with me:

"God gives love and God IS love. Most people don't take the time to wrap their mind around that concept."

My coworker got off at her stop and the man stopped talking to us. The woman across from us started talking to him to. She was also very religious and they had a conversation that i listened in on. They shared their ideas about God and she said something that stuck out to me too:

"Love can get you higher than any drug. A type of euphoria that nothing else compares to."

They both eventually got off the train and said good night to me. I said thank you to them. A few moments later realized that my friend sent me this via a Facebook message:

"Love can make people do strange things, but it can do even stranger things to your brain. Lucy Brown, a professor in the department of neurology and neuroscience at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York, found that people's brains were flooded with dopamine -- a neurotransmitter that affects pleasure and motivation -- when they were shown photographs of their lovers. As a result, love seems to trigger the same kind of euphoric effects achieved by certain drugs, including cocaine."

That is no coincidence that he sent that to me at that specific time. Everyone involved was meant to be involved, speak their mind, and share it with me. This year i have questioned love and, i hate to say it, doubted love. And here I am faced with so many signs, voices, faces, moments telling me love is something to believe in. Something to hold on to.

This year i have had the luxury of having one of my goals look me in the face and say, "You have to believe this is possible". I would be a fool not to take that advice.

Mmm..Spacebags

https://www.spacebag.com/spacebag/?cid=901715

I think these will change my life.

Desiderata

This poem always brings me back when i lose perspective:

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.


With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

--Max Ehrmann

Back and on Fire!!

Great weekend: check. plus.

This week was truly a battle of wills between what my mind sees and what is actually happening and also a battle between my mind and my heart. I called in the beginning of the week, i said " People only see what they want to see." and I became a shining example of my statement. This week I completely had the blinders on--well maybe not blinders, but some sort of distorted version of rose colored glasses. More like shit colored glasses, or demon colored glasses. Things that were not normally threatening were definitely a threat to me. Everything was overwhelming to the point of me crying and running in the other direction. Sad..lol but true and according to most people I've spoken to, totally valid. Though, i still feel it is not totally valid to give in to sinking feelings like that.

So, a few weeks worth of gradually building negative energy, extremely overwhelming days at work, rainy days, and feeling cynical about love (of all things)--well this all led to a breakdown/meltdown on Tuesday ( i couldn't make it to mid week..sad) Shaken up, i tryed to heal for the remainder of the week. I ended up getting a bad cold anyway so i had permission to just lay around and be. I had my show so i used that as an outlet. I had my friends who immediately just make me feel my best. And I also have my poems that i read to put me in perspective. And dancing all night with friends always helps :)

Most importantly and simply i took time just to tell my mind to SHUT THE FUCK UP and i told my mouth to smile. And let me tell you, you can't help to see the beauty in life when you do that. Its like when my Tai Chi teacher freshman yr told us to smile with our eyes..can we see through our smile?

Hey Jealousy

So today's topic is jealousy. I bring it up because I have noticed i only get jealous for two things: if it involves something i want theatre/ acting wise, or if it involves someone i really love. I know that i am falling out of love with something of someone when i don't feel threatened by others trying to get it too. As a former catholic school girl, I have been taught that..

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves."
-- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

"It does not envy." But there are times when my eyes are definitely green. But i know that i LOVE theatre and would do anything for it. The easy mature way to love it is to trust it and realise that there is enough in this world to go around and make every one's dreams come true. But what if that love is for a person, an individual and NO-- there is not an infinite supply of this person for everyone who wants him. The kind you would do anything for. Does the fact that i wanted to break some bitch's face for getting to close make my love anything less? Does it change what i call this feeling? Does it redefine it to something weaker?

I recognize that it leads to immature gut reactions like, "Bitch, I will drag you across this room by your jaw and beat you with the first thing i find on the other side!"

But i also recognize that it sets that person or thing apart from the rest. That it is a romantic, lusty love. Bc there is "Wanna do you" and then there's "I love you and will go through anything for/with you" and what i am talking about an elevated combo of the two. That exciting feeling is hard to come by so I guess i just need to learn how to balance those jealous feelings with trust. Trust that it can be mine if i want it to be.

Pic of the Day (aka Pot'd)

So i am going to try to do this on the daily..Daily Pot'd updates. Say that fast and it kinda has the If You Seek Amy effect. Sounds like Pot Head. But that's not what has inspired the taking or interpretation of the following gift i give to you. Honest!

Picture of the day! courtesy of my iPhone which is lovingly named "Magic Wand"

This one is from Sunday. It was gorgeous. I just thought about the word gorgeous wouldn't it be f'd up if it translated to "full of gore". Any who:



Sometimes i see flowers like this :)

If I may..

If I may describe the picture:

I wall, a girl and a bomb inside her
But not one that ticks to disaster
Maybe it's not a bomb at all
Following the nature of bombs
Well time bombs,
It's has to go off and it's just a matter
A matter of fact.

(Yep, I am officially driving myself crazy.)

Hopefully when the time comes it will explode something lovely.
Or loving.

(oh yeah, loco bananas)

Tranquilo

Not just one of the latest Vitamin Water flavors (which is damn tasty, might i add).

From this moment forward i pledge to chill out. Like for real this time. Two conversations with a great friend taught me something. One conversation involved speaking mostly about qualities we would required people to have if they were to be friends with us. One of mine was of course imagination. one of his was the ability to sit around and do absolutely nothing with him. Like, just sit around and be peaceful. Just taking in the world, etc., with no judgement letting thoughts flow in and out of the mind as they will without dwelling too much on a particular subject.

Now this is something we do often together whether we are sitting around or taking one of our walks to remember. I have done it with others. I have done this with myself too. Well actually i haven't done it with myself lately and that shows. I have felt busier than i have felt since last yr, and last yr i was in my senior yr of college/ working/ acting in 3 different shows and projects for classes/ interning/ somehow socializing. i have been a little too concerned with A WHOLE LOT lately and the effects of it are visible in all sectors of my life from my home, to my body to, my health ( i got sick for the first time since i went veg a yr and a half ago)

Anyway, the second conversation barely had any words at all. But it was probably one of our best convo's ever though. We were drained from a long day of auditioning and starving, and that was partly the reason we were not so talkative. There was a lot of silence but it wasnt a bad thing and in about a half an hour i felt renewed and full again. Better actually. Reminded me of the times were i would do this regularly. Meditative. Just taking the time to feel the moment rather than dictate it is essential to life and should take up more of our time than planning and running up that endless flight of stairs that will get you to your happiness. The creative people we are, anytime a noteable thought would pop in to our minds we would talk about it briefly but the we would settle back--

Sorry OMG i just got up and reenacted the monologue i just saw on a rerun of Desperate House Wives.

--And well yeah i guess that proves it!! I need to act. I need to do these things. it is a part of me and has been ever since i was a little girl and pictured credits rolling in my mind before i entered my fake kitchen playset to play house with my cousins. And yes it requires me to be intense sometimes, and yes it can clutter the mind-- but taking time just to be..well just to "be" is what puts things in perspective. In a better perspective than making to do lists and planning to plan plans. I have goals. But instead if striving and barely surviving for them, i choose to live the peace the peace that comes with achieving them. And i can access them at any time including this present moment.

Poem: Feel that Teenage Skin

It's truly amazing to feel things falling into place.
Falling as they may/ haphazardly
Feeling confident that whoever is responsible
Believes this is the right move too.

It's an intricate game
A puzzle if you will
The rules are simple
The prize is gained by your freedom to choose

Days like this are why I believe
Why don't keep love to myself
It's how achieve

I can feel the pieces interlocking
There is no distance between things
So naturally, there's no stopping.

watching 17 kids and counting

I just watched 4 out of 17 kids get freaked out by a friendly waiter at a "fancy" restaurant. I wonder what they would think after 5 minutes in NYC..

Let me get you up to speed (dating)

Forgive me for I have sinned. It has been too long since my last post.

So today was a day of indulgence. Many drinks, many meals, many laughs and a whole lot of men. Today i dated 50 guys.

Your thoughts: You slut! and its a Sunday...

I went speed dating with two of my girls. It was a good time we met some interesting and some not so interesting peeps. A few really stuck out to me. Hopefully something positive will come out of this like an actual date. This is the first attempt of many to get out there into the dating scene this yr. The weather is getting warmer--time to emerge from hibernation with color, vigor and good vibes.

I had a breakthrough the other dia that needs to be blogged in but i am too tired to write about it. This actress must get her sanity rest.

I can make bananas!

Yes, you heard correctly. To you that might mean nothing or nonsense but to me it means that i can make anything happen.

So today wasn't a perfect 10. Not every day is. I am a big girl and i know that, but when it interferes with one of my passions (i know i have many) it sends me down a bit of a spiral.

So this passion that my non perfect day fucked with was acting. So let me rephrase a previous statement: My 2nd audition was not a perfect 10. (I just realized saying my whole day sucked is a bit dramatic considering its mid afternoon). And that was all i can think about for the hour following it.

It could have been avoided. I made a not so smart decision. After two phone convos, one short and one long, and a "scent journey" at Aveda I was feeling differently.

These are some things to remember and be thankful for today:

1. Today I finally, FINALLY was seen at an Equity call. For those of you who don't know the Actor's Equity Association has open calls for members. I am not one (yet, tee hee) and therefore have to wait for possibly hours on end for the possibility of being seen. To quote myself from one of my nightly aim convos, "i would rather sit there for hours on a 'maybe' than be comfortable at home on a definite 'no'". Of course you have to get there super early and sign up on a list so that way if they call only five people, you will be one of them. But today I got past the monitors table and into the room. And i got out before 12.

2. I had 2 auditions today! Not 1, but 2!! And the first one went really well :) It did-- the casting director said so. Hooray!

3.I have wonderful friends who help me in their own way. I am thankful for all of them even ones who i haven't seen in a while.

Quote of the Day ( So far..)

Me: I have a banana in my purse.
R: Eat it.
Me: Nah, I want something I can't make.
R: You can make bananas?

My Mom and American Idol

My Mom and her boyfriend take American Idol way too seriously. From 8-10 or what ever time block it is, they sit entranced by the TV.

When its Mom alone, she's loud enough. Screaming as loud as a full audience and clapping. She gives standing O's and applauds for a little longer than the standard time.

But Mom and Robert together--i might as well be there live. The energy in the sala is that of intense devotion, the kind that is felt during really important games during some sport season like soccer or the Olympics where its country against country. Rob has a notebook that he lists all the names in and the respective phone numbers to vote for them. He dishes out expert commentary that only someone who is not an expert can make. He circles the names that he intends to vote for and debates who will get his coveted votes as the night goes on. He drinks soda from a plastic wine glass. She eats chocolate covered pretzels. When anyone Latino(a) or from New York sings she cheers loudly, something like "YEAH NEW YORK!! WHOOO!!" or as she said for Jorge Nunez from Puerto Rico (she could not be contained), "WHOOOOO!! REPRESENT THE ISLAAAAAND!" She plucked me out of my room for him. "Come see the kid from Puerto Rico! He's skinny, and cute, and gay. You'll love him."

I'm suppose to be boycotting American Idol because they did not let in a certain skinny, cute, gay guy who i already have love for and is extremely talented. But i can't say no to Ma so i sat through it. He sung an Elton John song. He was good. But I know my friend, who is Richie if you couldn't figure it out, is better. My mom looks at me abruptly and states, "YOU HAVE TO VOTE." She said it almost with the same passion she used when she told me to vote for the '08 election only tonight she sounded a little more desperate.

Oh and Thalisha is also a reason i boycott the show because they didn't put her adorable singing self through either.

What can i say, I'm from the Bronx..i can't resist "shout out"..LOL

Not tonight.

I have decided that there are some people that i just don't understand. At all. And that some people mesh well for certain occasions; and that there are certain fluke days that people get along and understand each other better.

I thought that it was just straight men that i don't understand sometimes. But its gay men too. Something about having a penis. No offense my loves but sometimes i feel like having an extra appendage in a distracting place like between your legs sets the brain off balance.

I often wonder what its like for a man to orgasm.

People are getting more connected by social networking sites, texting, virtual blah blah. People can get in touch in a mili sec, but understanding only comes face to face for some. And tonight is not an exception.

But there are a few who are understandable through any medium to me. And for that i am oh so grateful <3

So I just saw a picture of...

So i just saw a picture of a fairly hot guy (like an 8) and i gave the picture a "thumbs up" and a nod. It made me feel slightly macho. Is that weird?

Baccalaureate: Subway word of the day

baccalaureate

Main Entry: bac·ca·lau·re·ate
Pronunciation: \ˌba-kə-ˈlȯr-ē-ət, -ˈlär-\
Function: noun
Etymology: Medieval Latin baccalaureatus, from baccalaureus bachelor, alteration of baccalarius
Date: circa 1649
1: the degree of bachelor conferred by universities and colleges
2 a: a sermon to a graduating class b: the service at which this sermon is delivered

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/baccalaureate

WWMD?

I cannot say no when Richie offers me pizza.

No innuendo--i ate literally pizza. I avoid cheese as if it were meat itself, but he orders me a pizza pie and i down half of it. Actually, we each had a pie. Mine plain/ his pepperoni and bacon (gag!) Yet we look FAB!



And there is something just so addictive about it. I also had Cheesy Bread or what i like to call "reverse pizza". Essentially the same thing. 'Cept sauce is optional. I cannot bel i ate half the pizza. tee hee hee.

well the point was to get ideas for audition songs because i need for my audition utility belt to be filled with weapons of mass awesomeness.

Dairy and singing..lol



Speaking of auditions. Had one earlier. And yes i got the part! Whoo/hoo!

After the singing/pizza fest we gathered Krystar up and took ourselves to the cinema.

Ask yourself: "what would Medea do?" (WWMD?)

Sushi

A feast for Queens!

The return of sushi dinners with my bitches. And when i say my bitches i mean Richie and Krystal ;) We haven't done this for months. Glad you are back *Krystar*!

People Poison by my cousin Taty :)

poetry runs in the family :)